She is named Fedora and is called Fred, He is called Funk, The last name is Flow, The Flow’s are not like any other married couple, They lived in a camper trailer and have been married for twenty years or more. They have no children and have never been able to figure out where children come from.
Fedora ( Fred) has a younger sister and comes from a family of fifteen, The younger sister has so many children, she lives on three floors of a down town hotel, She has had five husbands and all have been driven nuts and all live on a Funny Farm. The state pays for everything the sister needs or wants, with your tax dollars. Now I know that makes you dislike her right from the start.
But Fred ( Fedora ) is running for a State Senator seat and is the favorite of most voters. The people of the State, figure she doesn’t have enough brain cells to be dangerous! It is a well known fact that her opponent ( a liberal ) is a Lady Chaser, Gambler and a Crook, and spends money left and right on whatever he or his girlfriends want! The only good thing one can say about him is: he has a really nice dog and everyone loves her.
Fred has worked for the State Fish & Game Dept, at the fish hatchery, for over twenty years. She has spent so much time with the fish, she kind of looks like one. I have heard stories that she can breath under water. Fred is not really ugly, she has long blonde hair, a roman nose, soft puffy lips, no ears, eyes with long eye lashes on each side of her head. The last time she was asked, she gave her age as being: sixty two inches long and weight as seventy two pounds.
Funk works at the cities refuge site. He once taught at a well known college in the east. Funk doesn’t receive a wage or a salary, he works for peanuts and has some benefits. One is: He has first choice of anything he finds left at the dump. He has collected a lot of great things and is proud to show them to anyone. His pile is larger than the Cities dump site is. Since Funk doesn’t receive any money, he wasn’t able to buy gas, for his car, to get from home to work and back. The City lets Funk, live in an old tool shed that is on the dump grounds. It would be hard to describe Funk. He looks kind of like a shaggy dog, friendly and happy! There are usually so many flies and insects buzzing around his head, you really can’t tell what he looks like.
Funk was once the chief hydrologists for the cities water supply. Some how, Funk pulled the plug on the dam and all the water was lost. That is only one of the reasons why he lost his position as Chief Hydrologist. But Funk is happier today, than he has been in any other time of his life.
The election came and gone and Fred won her seat in Washington and is doing a great job. Above all other things, she is dearly loved by everyone except a guy by the name of Burock. O’bum.
Funk’s Mother and Father were separated right after Funk was born, she went to Hollywood and became a famous star in the movies.
His father got his start in life by working at the college as a Janitor. This is where he met Funk’s mother and she got pregnant. She was known as the campus party girl and every boy at the collage had dated her. She caused so much trouble at the college, she was asked to leave and Funk ( Flow’s father ) quit his janitor job and went with her.
Soon after, Funk was born, then their apartment caught a fire and burnt to the ground. She went to Hollywood and he went to Iowa and took Funk with him. Funk grew up doing the usual things that a young man does and attended college. He was slow but bright. It was thought that he would go far in life and today he is a junk man for the City.
The moral of this story is: You don’t have to be rich, young, smart to get the best things in life, You can be dumb, poor and ugly and even become a Dump master. Just don’t try to cheat the City and you will be okay!
Hey, I saw it first! It’s mine!
By: Ben R.
June 6, 2011
Fedora ( Fred) has a younger sister and comes from a family of fifteen, The younger sister has so many children, she lives on three floors of a down town hotel, She has had five husbands and all have been driven nuts and all live on a Funny Farm. The state pays for everything the sister needs or wants, with your tax dollars. Now I know that makes you dislike her right from the start.
But Fred ( Fedora ) is running for a State Senator seat and is the favorite of most voters. The people of the State, figure she doesn’t have enough brain cells to be dangerous! It is a well known fact that her opponent ( a liberal ) is a Lady Chaser, Gambler and a Crook, and spends money left and right on whatever he or his girlfriends want! The only good thing one can say about him is: he has a really nice dog and everyone loves her.
Fred has worked for the State Fish & Game Dept, at the fish hatchery, for over twenty years. She has spent so much time with the fish, she kind of looks like one. I have heard stories that she can breath under water. Fred is not really ugly, she has long blonde hair, a roman nose, soft puffy lips, no ears, eyes with long eye lashes on each side of her head. The last time she was asked, she gave her age as being: sixty two inches long and weight as seventy two pounds.
Funk works at the cities refuge site. He once taught at a well known college in the east. Funk doesn’t receive a wage or a salary, he works for peanuts and has some benefits. One is: He has first choice of anything he finds left at the dump. He has collected a lot of great things and is proud to show them to anyone. His pile is larger than the Cities dump site is. Since Funk doesn’t receive any money, he wasn’t able to buy gas, for his car, to get from home to work and back. The City lets Funk, live in an old tool shed that is on the dump grounds. It would be hard to describe Funk. He looks kind of like a shaggy dog, friendly and happy! There are usually so many flies and insects buzzing around his head, you really can’t tell what he looks like.
Funk was once the chief hydrologists for the cities water supply. Some how, Funk pulled the plug on the dam and all the water was lost. That is only one of the reasons why he lost his position as Chief Hydrologist. But Funk is happier today, than he has been in any other time of his life.
The election came and gone and Fred won her seat in Washington and is doing a great job. Above all other things, she is dearly loved by everyone except a guy by the name of Burock. O’bum.
Funk’s Mother and Father were separated right after Funk was born, she went to Hollywood and became a famous star in the movies.
His father got his start in life by working at the college as a Janitor. This is where he met Funk’s mother and she got pregnant. She was known as the campus party girl and every boy at the collage had dated her. She caused so much trouble at the college, she was asked to leave and Funk ( Flow’s father ) quit his janitor job and went with her.
Soon after, Funk was born, then their apartment caught a fire and burnt to the ground. She went to Hollywood and he went to Iowa and took Funk with him. Funk grew up doing the usual things that a young man does and attended college. He was slow but bright. It was thought that he would go far in life and today he is a junk man for the City.
The moral of this story is: You don’t have to be rich, young, smart to get the best things in life, You can be dumb, poor and ugly and even become a Dump master. Just don’t try to cheat the City and you will be okay!
Hey, I saw it first! It’s mine!
By: Ben R.
June 6, 2011
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