One has to be nuts to Love me, How many of you nuts are out there?
This has been a strange week, Wednesday came before Tuesday and Sunday was here twice last week. Tomorrow disappeared yesterday and the rabbit died.
That should explain everything, unless you have to have the truth. If you said yes, sorry, but I don’t have it. It may have fallen in the wrinkles someplace. Wrinkles can be found just about anywhere, your face, your neck, your butt, but the worst ones are in the corner of your eyes. Take a good look at those wrinkles under your arms and your chest. Peggy bought some carrots with wrinkles, last week, that looked like they were four hundred years old.
We tried to eat them for supper that night, but we couldn’t even cut them with a razor sharp knife. She has been steaming them all week long. If we can’t eat them, the next time she puts them on the table, I’ll donate them to the Air Force and they can use them as bombs over Iraq.
Now let us all bow our heads and pray, while the ushers pick your pockets and you know, that you should always bring cash, when coming to church, credit cards are no longer accepted. We will start making sacrifices the third week in June, so write your name on a slip and drop it in the box. May God Bless you and the church elders thank you.
We do have a couple of announcements to make. The pot luck supper that is usually had on Thursday night, will be held on Friday evening, starting at 4:30 pm. Changing the day was to better serve the number of people that will be attending and to serve the homeless. The church will supply the paper Plates and Napkins .. Please put your hot foods in something that will keep the foods hot. And please bring your own silverware, as we will hardly have enough plastic for the Homeless! The bakery will supply the bread or buns at a reduced price. So please consider this in your offerings.
Roller skating, for the elder people , on Friday night has been canceled, due to other activities and our bus has broken down and needs repair. Again consider this in your offerings on Sunday.
The marriage union between Mary J and John B. will not take place as scheduled, because John will not conform to rules and regulations set forth by the church. He said that forty percent of his earnings is too much for a person in his income bracket. He say: This is not negotiable ! We ask that you do not include him in your prayers!
The rumor that has been circulating about Hazel Brown, continues to grow and what is true or not true is confusing. Perhaps you should leave town Hazel, until it all blows over.
The Kid that threw the ball through the Mayor’s window, The police want you to stop by. Bring your father and his insurance policy. You may need to bring your Pajamas also.
Next, We have noticed some grumbling on the seating arrangement in church. This will be discussed at our next regular meeting, of which you will be notified of. Please feel free to attend and add any comments you would like to make. Comments must be mad in person to be heard.
If you are not going to be able to attend church on Sunday, Please send your Offering to the treasurey of KKK, 1919 God Loves Lane, Anytown, USA 666-9999.
May someone have mercy on you! Monsignor Double Ott eight,
Ben R.
This has been a strange week, Wednesday came before Tuesday and Sunday was here twice last week. Tomorrow disappeared yesterday and the rabbit died.
That should explain everything, unless you have to have the truth. If you said yes, sorry, but I don’t have it. It may have fallen in the wrinkles someplace. Wrinkles can be found just about anywhere, your face, your neck, your butt, but the worst ones are in the corner of your eyes. Take a good look at those wrinkles under your arms and your chest. Peggy bought some carrots with wrinkles, last week, that looked like they were four hundred years old.
We tried to eat them for supper that night, but we couldn’t even cut them with a razor sharp knife. She has been steaming them all week long. If we can’t eat them, the next time she puts them on the table, I’ll donate them to the Air Force and they can use them as bombs over Iraq.
Now let us all bow our heads and pray, while the ushers pick your pockets and you know, that you should always bring cash, when coming to church, credit cards are no longer accepted. We will start making sacrifices the third week in June, so write your name on a slip and drop it in the box. May God Bless you and the church elders thank you.
We do have a couple of announcements to make. The pot luck supper that is usually had on Thursday night, will be held on Friday evening, starting at 4:30 pm. Changing the day was to better serve the number of people that will be attending and to serve the homeless. The church will supply the paper Plates and Napkins .. Please put your hot foods in something that will keep the foods hot. And please bring your own silverware, as we will hardly have enough plastic for the Homeless! The bakery will supply the bread or buns at a reduced price. So please consider this in your offerings.
Roller skating, for the elder people , on Friday night has been canceled, due to other activities and our bus has broken down and needs repair. Again consider this in your offerings on Sunday.
The marriage union between Mary J and John B. will not take place as scheduled, because John will not conform to rules and regulations set forth by the church. He said that forty percent of his earnings is too much for a person in his income bracket. He say: This is not negotiable ! We ask that you do not include him in your prayers!
The rumor that has been circulating about Hazel Brown, continues to grow and what is true or not true is confusing. Perhaps you should leave town Hazel, until it all blows over.
The Kid that threw the ball through the Mayor’s window, The police want you to stop by. Bring your father and his insurance policy. You may need to bring your Pajamas also.
Next, We have noticed some grumbling on the seating arrangement in church. This will be discussed at our next regular meeting, of which you will be notified of. Please feel free to attend and add any comments you would like to make. Comments must be mad in person to be heard.
If you are not going to be able to attend church on Sunday, Please send your Offering to the treasurey of KKK, 1919 God Loves Lane, Anytown, USA 666-9999.
May someone have mercy on you! Monsignor Double Ott eight,
Ben R.
Aug 18,2009
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