Have you ever had a day, where everything just fell into place!
I took my dog ( Trouble ) to the butcher shop, to pick out a bone, The butcher looks at me and says, We don’t sell meat here, we sell donuts. I went outside and looked at the sign once again. It said “ Al” Auto parts, everything for your Auto foreign and domestic”
Back into the store I went, The man ask what I needed and I told him some new windshield wiper blades. He said: you will find those at the store across the street. Well give me a dozen donuts then, he said sorry we don’t have any!
So across the street I go and have to stand in this line. I finally get up to the window and the lady says, What kind of stamps would you like? I said; Is this the Post Office? and she said “N0”, that is five blocks north, Being so stupid I ask: why are you selling stamps here then? She says: because the Post Office don’t have any.
Now where is that dog of mine. Bet you can’t guess where I found him! He was at the IRS office, chewing on a bone twice his size and growling.
While I was waiting for the dog, I decided to have a cup of coffee, the closet café was down the street. The traffic light on the corner, didn’t seem to be working right. The light turned green and another sign with a hand on it, said, Do Not cross on the green arrow. I waited until the sign with the hand turned green and I stepped off of the curb. “Wham” I was hit by a car that was driven by a little old lady and dragged all the way down to the Post office.
At the post Office, someone had called the police and all the police cars in the city were there with lights flashing and sirens blaring. There were only two doctors in the town, both showed up at the post office along with one that was retired. They all agreed that I should be taken to the hospital and checked out,
The town only has a thousand people living in it, but two Thousand five hundred showed up at the scene. Don’t know who called the ambulance but there was only one hospital and the ambulance belonged to them. The hospital was in another town, ten miles south on high way 67. It appears that there was a problem with the ambulance, so they sent their back-up. It was old, horse drawn wagon that was often used for funerals. The team was a mare, ten or twelve hands high and a pony. We didn’t arrive at this hospital until late in the evening.
People at the hospital were fighting with each other to see, who would get to do what, for me. It was thought that an X-ray was needed, but the hospital never had an x-ray machine, so a portable unit was flown in and pictures were taken. The following morning, most of the x-ray pictures were found in the local news paper. After some hours of discussion It was decided that I could leave the hospital. So, with a band aid on my right elbow. I left the hospital. No one had offered to give me a ride back to the other town! How would I even get there. The county sheriff told me that no hitch hiking was allowed in the county and if I were caught, I would go to jail. If I wanted to walk, I would have to use trails and back roads.
There were no taxi cabs in this town and there wasn’t going to be a bus until Thursday, and that was two days away. What was I going to do ? I found an old bicycle that was missing a front tire and offered a few dollars for it. The lady said I could have it. for just taking it away. It was getting dark and if the sheriff was to see this, he would surely find a reason to stop me. So I had to sneak away in the dark. The front wheel made grinding, screeching sound, as I rode it down the high way. One car passed me, going the same direction and none going the other way.
When I had arrived back in my home town, I was on my last few breaths, After a rest, I went looking for my little dog (Trouble), he was laying in an alley and the bone that he had been chewing on, was now on the inside of the little guy.
Later, I got to wondering, where Trouble had found that bone. It couldn’t have been……No, he wouldn’t do that, I don’t think he would attack an IRS agent? But it was a rather large bone.
Anyone want to rent my Dog this income tax season?
I took my dog ( Trouble ) to the butcher shop, to pick out a bone, The butcher looks at me and says, We don’t sell meat here, we sell donuts. I went outside and looked at the sign once again. It said “ Al” Auto parts, everything for your Auto foreign and domestic”
Back into the store I went, The man ask what I needed and I told him some new windshield wiper blades. He said: you will find those at the store across the street. Well give me a dozen donuts then, he said sorry we don’t have any!
So across the street I go and have to stand in this line. I finally get up to the window and the lady says, What kind of stamps would you like? I said; Is this the Post Office? and she said “N0”, that is five blocks north, Being so stupid I ask: why are you selling stamps here then? She says: because the Post Office don’t have any.
Now where is that dog of mine. Bet you can’t guess where I found him! He was at the IRS office, chewing on a bone twice his size and growling.
While I was waiting for the dog, I decided to have a cup of coffee, the closet café was down the street. The traffic light on the corner, didn’t seem to be working right. The light turned green and another sign with a hand on it, said, Do Not cross on the green arrow. I waited until the sign with the hand turned green and I stepped off of the curb. “Wham” I was hit by a car that was driven by a little old lady and dragged all the way down to the Post office.
At the post Office, someone had called the police and all the police cars in the city were there with lights flashing and sirens blaring. There were only two doctors in the town, both showed up at the post office along with one that was retired. They all agreed that I should be taken to the hospital and checked out,
The town only has a thousand people living in it, but two Thousand five hundred showed up at the scene. Don’t know who called the ambulance but there was only one hospital and the ambulance belonged to them. The hospital was in another town, ten miles south on high way 67. It appears that there was a problem with the ambulance, so they sent their back-up. It was old, horse drawn wagon that was often used for funerals. The team was a mare, ten or twelve hands high and a pony. We didn’t arrive at this hospital until late in the evening.
People at the hospital were fighting with each other to see, who would get to do what, for me. It was thought that an X-ray was needed, but the hospital never had an x-ray machine, so a portable unit was flown in and pictures were taken. The following morning, most of the x-ray pictures were found in the local news paper. After some hours of discussion It was decided that I could leave the hospital. So, with a band aid on my right elbow. I left the hospital. No one had offered to give me a ride back to the other town! How would I even get there. The county sheriff told me that no hitch hiking was allowed in the county and if I were caught, I would go to jail. If I wanted to walk, I would have to use trails and back roads.
There were no taxi cabs in this town and there wasn’t going to be a bus until Thursday, and that was two days away. What was I going to do ? I found an old bicycle that was missing a front tire and offered a few dollars for it. The lady said I could have it. for just taking it away. It was getting dark and if the sheriff was to see this, he would surely find a reason to stop me. So I had to sneak away in the dark. The front wheel made grinding, screeching sound, as I rode it down the high way. One car passed me, going the same direction and none going the other way.
When I had arrived back in my home town, I was on my last few breaths, After a rest, I went looking for my little dog (Trouble), he was laying in an alley and the bone that he had been chewing on, was now on the inside of the little guy.
Later, I got to wondering, where Trouble had found that bone. It couldn’t have been……No, he wouldn’t do that, I don’t think he would attack an IRS agent? But it was a rather large bone.
Anyone want to rent my Dog this income tax season?
Mar. 3, 2010
By; Ben R.
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