I’m not a mouse named Mickey, or a Cat named Tom. I am not a cow named Nellie. Nor am I Denny the Dino, or Mack the Knife and I am not Snow White. Or one of the seven Dwarfs. I am a Monster Moose name Bull.
I have to work. My first and last job was in a fine crystal and serving ware shop. My first customer was an old bat, with a stuck up nose, longer than a witches broom handle and when she opened her eyes and saw me, she screamed bloody murder and was falling all over everything breaking things left and right. The shop was in such a mess it had to close. The owner clamed a Million or two dollars, damage.
To make a living, now, I work on week ends and special days like Christmas, New years and the forth of July. I work at a very exclusive club that caters for Kings , Queens and famous people. I am a coat & hat, Cape, Fur and Cane keeper, while people are at this club. I am not allowed to engage in conversations. Smoke or drink or tell jokes while on duty. I must wear a white shirt and a red bow tie when I work, and that is not easy for a Moose to do. I stand behind a counter, with my antlers sticking out, so people can hang what ever they have on my wide full rack.
The pay is not the best, but people with money are always cheap and non-participating, when it come to tipping. We have two Cigar and Cigarette girls moving around the club and one cutie, who will take a photos, if asked. This is not a club where you can find a lady of the evening. They are found on street corners or listed in the phone book under Escort service. These girls at the club make more money in one night than I do all year long.
I must weigh over eight hundred pounds and stand six foot two at my shoulders. They say; I am only half grown. I do not have many friends and most people tend to stay away from me, I think it is fear. I am really a nice Moose, once we become friends. My girl friend, she ran off with an Elk named Fred. Fred is a married Elk and has a bunch of kids at home and his wife is a late riser. He has this thing about other young girls.
Fred is a moocher of the worst kind. I doubt if he has worked one day in his whole life. When Fred isn’t in someone’s bed room, he will be found in the detoxification tank at the police station.
He is in and out of there so often, a place is held open for him. Most people think Fred is one of the Good Old Boys. You always know when Old Fred, is around, he smells like old sheep dip. One time Fred was caught out in a rain storm and that washed a lot of the smell away. After that, he really didn’t smell all that bad for a day or so.
Fred lives on money he collected from a hunting accident. Some drunken hunter was out deer hunting and shot old Fred in the horse power end, and was awarded a tidy some for life. Most animals will say, Justice was not done and Fred was the least deserving. There was no proof that the drunk even fired a shot. It is even thought, that old Fred and the Judge are related or partners in a few ventures.
The only thing I have ever done right, is to never have married. I am so thankful that I do not have a wife and kids to support. Why I don’t even make enough money to have to file a tax return. I live or I should say, I share an old shed in an area behind the old sales barn. A couple of goats and a few other animals also reside there. I eat what ever is left, from the dinners served at the club.
Life would be better if I just went out into the forest and roam in the Meadows that Mother nature provides. But then, I have never lived in the wild and wouldn’t know where to sleep or what to eat. What does a Moose eat?, berries, roots, leaves or the bark off of young trees? Should a moose eat grass? I can’t even go into a library to get a book to read and learn about these things.
I have been told that I was born in the back country of Canada and that my mother was killed by a young hunter that couldn’t tell the difference between a male and a female moose. I was taken to a place where young animals were cared for, Then Later I was placed in a Zoo in Missouri. The people there, must have thought I was an Elephant, as all they give me to eat was Peanuts and Peanut Butter. After that, I was sent to California and was lost in all the confusion.
You already know how hard it is to make a living. Once a man alone could support his family. Then his wife had to go to work to help. Now it takes the Man, The Women and four of the five Kids to make ends meet. The economy is so bad and getting worse. You have to take two steps backwards, before you can go forward one step. Part of the world is Burning, other parts are Flooding is doing a lot of damage. Dust is covering some places in Arizona, Tornados and Volcanoes are taking a large toll. Prices keep going up and up and, You don’t know which way to turn!
People are praying from one end of the earth to the other and nothing is happening! Danger is lurking everywhere. Don’t go out after Dark and lock all the doors and windows. Leave the lights on all night long and, did you put the car in the Garage?
But if you think your world is bad, You should try looking at it, through a Moose’s eyes!
By; Ben R.
I have to work. My first and last job was in a fine crystal and serving ware shop. My first customer was an old bat, with a stuck up nose, longer than a witches broom handle and when she opened her eyes and saw me, she screamed bloody murder and was falling all over everything breaking things left and right. The shop was in such a mess it had to close. The owner clamed a Million or two dollars, damage.
To make a living, now, I work on week ends and special days like Christmas, New years and the forth of July. I work at a very exclusive club that caters for Kings , Queens and famous people. I am a coat & hat, Cape, Fur and Cane keeper, while people are at this club. I am not allowed to engage in conversations. Smoke or drink or tell jokes while on duty. I must wear a white shirt and a red bow tie when I work, and that is not easy for a Moose to do. I stand behind a counter, with my antlers sticking out, so people can hang what ever they have on my wide full rack.
The pay is not the best, but people with money are always cheap and non-participating, when it come to tipping. We have two Cigar and Cigarette girls moving around the club and one cutie, who will take a photos, if asked. This is not a club where you can find a lady of the evening. They are found on street corners or listed in the phone book under Escort service. These girls at the club make more money in one night than I do all year long.
I must weigh over eight hundred pounds and stand six foot two at my shoulders. They say; I am only half grown. I do not have many friends and most people tend to stay away from me, I think it is fear. I am really a nice Moose, once we become friends. My girl friend, she ran off with an Elk named Fred. Fred is a married Elk and has a bunch of kids at home and his wife is a late riser. He has this thing about other young girls.
Fred is a moocher of the worst kind. I doubt if he has worked one day in his whole life. When Fred isn’t in someone’s bed room, he will be found in the detoxification tank at the police station.
He is in and out of there so often, a place is held open for him. Most people think Fred is one of the Good Old Boys. You always know when Old Fred, is around, he smells like old sheep dip. One time Fred was caught out in a rain storm and that washed a lot of the smell away. After that, he really didn’t smell all that bad for a day or so.
Fred lives on money he collected from a hunting accident. Some drunken hunter was out deer hunting and shot old Fred in the horse power end, and was awarded a tidy some for life. Most animals will say, Justice was not done and Fred was the least deserving. There was no proof that the drunk even fired a shot. It is even thought, that old Fred and the Judge are related or partners in a few ventures.
The only thing I have ever done right, is to never have married. I am so thankful that I do not have a wife and kids to support. Why I don’t even make enough money to have to file a tax return. I live or I should say, I share an old shed in an area behind the old sales barn. A couple of goats and a few other animals also reside there. I eat what ever is left, from the dinners served at the club.
Life would be better if I just went out into the forest and roam in the Meadows that Mother nature provides. But then, I have never lived in the wild and wouldn’t know where to sleep or what to eat. What does a Moose eat?, berries, roots, leaves or the bark off of young trees? Should a moose eat grass? I can’t even go into a library to get a book to read and learn about these things.
I have been told that I was born in the back country of Canada and that my mother was killed by a young hunter that couldn’t tell the difference between a male and a female moose. I was taken to a place where young animals were cared for, Then Later I was placed in a Zoo in Missouri. The people there, must have thought I was an Elephant, as all they give me to eat was Peanuts and Peanut Butter. After that, I was sent to California and was lost in all the confusion.
You already know how hard it is to make a living. Once a man alone could support his family. Then his wife had to go to work to help. Now it takes the Man, The Women and four of the five Kids to make ends meet. The economy is so bad and getting worse. You have to take two steps backwards, before you can go forward one step. Part of the world is Burning, other parts are Flooding is doing a lot of damage. Dust is covering some places in Arizona, Tornados and Volcanoes are taking a large toll. Prices keep going up and up and, You don’t know which way to turn!
People are praying from one end of the earth to the other and nothing is happening! Danger is lurking everywhere. Don’t go out after Dark and lock all the doors and windows. Leave the lights on all night long and, did you put the car in the Garage?
But if you think your world is bad, You should try looking at it, through a Moose’s eyes!
By; Ben R.
July 7, 2011
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