If you can’t hold your little finger in the right position, don’t pick up the cup!
Saucers are for cooling ones tea and finger bowls are for cleansing fingers. You will have two napkins, one is for drying your fingers and the other is for wiping your upper lip. Never speak unless the Queen is speaking to you and don’t fool around with things in your pocket. Crumpets are not to be eaten, they are for sprinkling on ice. Chips are to be eaten with fish and if the fish smells, don’t eat it.
Sips and slurps are not allowed, bad moaners are for the Queen alone. Moaners are the passage of air (gas )from the inside to the outside. Cobblestones streets sometimes Stir up the gas, The Queen calls them. Rumble seat rattles.
Sour kraut is never to be served at breakfast and Milk is only given to babies with diapers. Old men that smell are to be kept outdoors. If there is a full moon, stick a rag in their mouth and put them in the basement. Young women have to be removed after one hour of exposure. Old women that do not gives stamps, are not to be admitted day or night.
Two and Two make six when the Queen say so. When you bow before the Queen, start at the top and bend forward and down, never never backwards with the bottom up. Never carry a red hanky in your hand, red is an insult to the Queen. If her cat snarls at you, back away slowly.
Never ask to use the toilet when you are at the palace, it could cost you more than you are prepared to pay. Short people are not allowed to enter the court yard or play with tall people, unless they are wearing pink slippers on their feet. Dark or brown cows do not give chocolate cheese, chocolate milk “yes”, Chinese cheese is redeemable only before noon and after two p.m.
Showers can be taken in the a.m. only, Tub baths are given at night. Swimming in the molt is not allowed, Garters are being overfed. Horse flies are to be kept in the stables at all times. Hovercraft has yet to be invented and gold is a whopping one dollar a pound.
Watch out for the King! Knights are lovers and long swords are for de-headings.
By; Ben R. Feb. 23, 2012
Saucers are for cooling ones tea and finger bowls are for cleansing fingers. You will have two napkins, one is for drying your fingers and the other is for wiping your upper lip. Never speak unless the Queen is speaking to you and don’t fool around with things in your pocket. Crumpets are not to be eaten, they are for sprinkling on ice. Chips are to be eaten with fish and if the fish smells, don’t eat it.
Sips and slurps are not allowed, bad moaners are for the Queen alone. Moaners are the passage of air (gas )from the inside to the outside. Cobblestones streets sometimes Stir up the gas, The Queen calls them. Rumble seat rattles.
Sour kraut is never to be served at breakfast and Milk is only given to babies with diapers. Old men that smell are to be kept outdoors. If there is a full moon, stick a rag in their mouth and put them in the basement. Young women have to be removed after one hour of exposure. Old women that do not gives stamps, are not to be admitted day or night.
Two and Two make six when the Queen say so. When you bow before the Queen, start at the top and bend forward and down, never never backwards with the bottom up. Never carry a red hanky in your hand, red is an insult to the Queen. If her cat snarls at you, back away slowly.
Never ask to use the toilet when you are at the palace, it could cost you more than you are prepared to pay. Short people are not allowed to enter the court yard or play with tall people, unless they are wearing pink slippers on their feet. Dark or brown cows do not give chocolate cheese, chocolate milk “yes”, Chinese cheese is redeemable only before noon and after two p.m.
Showers can be taken in the a.m. only, Tub baths are given at night. Swimming in the molt is not allowed, Garters are being overfed. Horse flies are to be kept in the stables at all times. Hovercraft has yet to be invented and gold is a whopping one dollar a pound.
Watch out for the King! Knights are lovers and long swords are for de-headings.
By; Ben R. Feb. 23, 2012
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