Have you ever noticed!
Those that laugh the longest usually get a stomach ache.
Those that walk slowly are usually tired.
Those that can not see in the dark, have no flash light.
Those that need love usually smell bad.
Why do people named Smith, say their last name is Jones.
People that don’t have any money in their pocket can never find their wallet.
People with shoe laces untied are usually fat or kids.
When someone looks at a new book, the first thing they look at is the price.
When people buy bread, it is usually is white, white toast is easier to burn.
Bitter butter is better butter and lard is bitter butter. So Chose peanut butter.
A person is not over the hill unless he is three/fourths way down the other side.
Taxes pays for nothing, you give it away because you are generous.
Tires are not round if they go bump bump. - bump bump - bump bump.
Dirty ears, filter out dirty words, that how they get dirty.
Alcohol kills bugs, Kill bugs, drink Alcohol and give milk to the kids.
One in the eye is not equal to two in the bush, never look up.
Slow time will come, fast time will go, lost time is never seen again.
Time frame, How do you frame time ?
Isn’t the food on a short menu the same as on the long menu.
Rich people give small tips, Small people give large tips.
People with out money don’t give tips they write checks or use credit cards.
People with out money, let people with money take them out to dinner.
Cats can’t out run dogs, they can change direction faster.
Fire men don’t climb trees, leave the cat up there. He will come down when he is ready.
Don’t lay your blanket in the shade, shade moves.
If walking on a hot day, you will get about 2 miles on one gallon. That’s not bad for caster oil.
Bad smells are usually gas, gas is usually light and light things usually rise. So if you can smell it, it must be heavy gas, now go change your shorts!
One in a million is the same as one out of two, One + one is two, see It doubled for you.
What savings time zone are we in, daylight or dark? Does it make a difference if you save time at the beginning or the end.
If you thought you heard something, is you hearing good or bad.
It is always Her before He if you both have to P.
Will too much thinking hurt your id?
Never give a second thought to what you forgot.
Turn your back to me and smile, Don’t touch me there. Why did you do that?
Never cook in a cracked pot, it will leeek.
Being nuts, is a term used by amateurs …….I am a mental case………..
Help! My thoughts are running wild….
Those that laugh the longest usually get a stomach ache.
Those that walk slowly are usually tired.
Those that can not see in the dark, have no flash light.
Those that need love usually smell bad.
Why do people named Smith, say their last name is Jones.
People that don’t have any money in their pocket can never find their wallet.
People with shoe laces untied are usually fat or kids.
When someone looks at a new book, the first thing they look at is the price.
When people buy bread, it is usually is white, white toast is easier to burn.
Bitter butter is better butter and lard is bitter butter. So Chose peanut butter.
A person is not over the hill unless he is three/fourths way down the other side.
Taxes pays for nothing, you give it away because you are generous.
Tires are not round if they go bump bump. - bump bump - bump bump.
Dirty ears, filter out dirty words, that how they get dirty.
Alcohol kills bugs, Kill bugs, drink Alcohol and give milk to the kids.
One in the eye is not equal to two in the bush, never look up.
Slow time will come, fast time will go, lost time is never seen again.
Time frame, How do you frame time ?
Isn’t the food on a short menu the same as on the long menu.
Rich people give small tips, Small people give large tips.
People with out money don’t give tips they write checks or use credit cards.
People with out money, let people with money take them out to dinner.
Cats can’t out run dogs, they can change direction faster.
Fire men don’t climb trees, leave the cat up there. He will come down when he is ready.
Don’t lay your blanket in the shade, shade moves.
If walking on a hot day, you will get about 2 miles on one gallon. That’s not bad for caster oil.
Bad smells are usually gas, gas is usually light and light things usually rise. So if you can smell it, it must be heavy gas, now go change your shorts!
One in a million is the same as one out of two, One + one is two, see It doubled for you.
What savings time zone are we in, daylight or dark? Does it make a difference if you save time at the beginning or the end.
If you thought you heard something, is you hearing good or bad.
It is always Her before He if you both have to P.
Will too much thinking hurt your id?
Never give a second thought to what you forgot.
Turn your back to me and smile, Don’t touch me there. Why did you do that?
Never cook in a cracked pot, it will leeek.
Being nuts, is a term used by amateurs …….I am a mental case………..
Help! My thoughts are running wild….
The last I seen of her, she was at the edge of the Light, than she disappeared when the light went out….
Ben R. Bauer
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