This will make you scratch your head!
I care! Do you care ? - I can But you can’t ! - If you do I won’t! - The same to you and don’t forget it!-It will cost you double!, I get it for free! - But I don’t want it so you can have it! - I was right. , You were wrong! - You keep it! , I don’t want it - Was that you? It sure wasn’t me! - It smells like burnt lead! , That usually happens when gas passes through lead!
The foundation is rocking and it’s your fault! - Not without grease you won’t! - Remember the Ell emm Moo? - Great minds don’t last long! -Stop wishing, the well is dry! - No No! under than over and back around and out! - Haven’t you every seen a house fly?- How about a horse fly or a fish fry?- How far do you want it to go?, A box of dynamite with a very short fuse will do it!
Heaven is one girl and three or four pair of new shoes!, Hell is when a man finds he is out numbered one to one! - Once you get to the top, you may not be able to get down. - Maybe you can make it in a box! , Was it worth it? - Stop, Look and run like hell! - We are not Open for your kind of business so keep it to yourself! - Watch my lips, Go right, right ,right you went left and missed everything - Help come in quarts, pints and fifths or in a small shot glass.
When one is never right they are seldom wrong. - Who ask you anyway? - I didn’t hear anything. - Two plus two is four and minus one is three and twelve is a life term if you get caught. - True Love is a blind man and a drunk native woman.- Money isn’t every thing but it’s all that matters and you can buy anything you want with it! - With or with out coffee the cream still costs and there is no free jelly on this table! - What goes on in the kitchen or behind the counter is no business of yours! - You didn’t have to go in there you know!
Most of ones troubles comes in the US Mail, Down with the US male - When your women starts leaking like a washer-less faucet , get a new one - Try a darker shade of white or a lighter shade of black. Nothing comes in pickle barrels anymore except pickles! - I’ll have a bucket of suds please and what’s in the free lunch today? Pigs feet with shoes! What the string for? Just in case it won’t flush, you say!
If the itch is gone, you can stop scratching ! Now that I have all that crap off and out of mind. I can start over with some clear thinking… { one & one is two, it’s working!}
PS. To all family members: My Grandmother was crazy and my mother had lost most of her marbles and I had a sister that was off her rocker and I think I am the only crazy one left in the family. But to be sure you better get some insurance! A dollar’s worth anyway………
I care! Do you care ? - I can But you can’t ! - If you do I won’t! - The same to you and don’t forget it!-It will cost you double!, I get it for free! - But I don’t want it so you can have it! - I was right. , You were wrong! - You keep it! , I don’t want it - Was that you? It sure wasn’t me! - It smells like burnt lead! , That usually happens when gas passes through lead!
The foundation is rocking and it’s your fault! - Not without grease you won’t! - Remember the Ell emm Moo? - Great minds don’t last long! -Stop wishing, the well is dry! - No No! under than over and back around and out! - Haven’t you every seen a house fly?- How about a horse fly or a fish fry?- How far do you want it to go?, A box of dynamite with a very short fuse will do it!
Heaven is one girl and three or four pair of new shoes!, Hell is when a man finds he is out numbered one to one! - Once you get to the top, you may not be able to get down. - Maybe you can make it in a box! , Was it worth it? - Stop, Look and run like hell! - We are not Open for your kind of business so keep it to yourself! - Watch my lips, Go right, right ,right you went left and missed everything - Help come in quarts, pints and fifths or in a small shot glass.
When one is never right they are seldom wrong. - Who ask you anyway? - I didn’t hear anything. - Two plus two is four and minus one is three and twelve is a life term if you get caught. - True Love is a blind man and a drunk native woman.- Money isn’t every thing but it’s all that matters and you can buy anything you want with it! - With or with out coffee the cream still costs and there is no free jelly on this table! - What goes on in the kitchen or behind the counter is no business of yours! - You didn’t have to go in there you know!
Most of ones troubles comes in the US Mail, Down with the US male - When your women starts leaking like a washer-less faucet , get a new one - Try a darker shade of white or a lighter shade of black. Nothing comes in pickle barrels anymore except pickles! - I’ll have a bucket of suds please and what’s in the free lunch today? Pigs feet with shoes! What the string for? Just in case it won’t flush, you say!
If the itch is gone, you can stop scratching ! Now that I have all that crap off and out of mind. I can start over with some clear thinking… { one & one is two, it’s working!}
PS. To all family members: My Grandmother was crazy and my mother had lost most of her marbles and I had a sister that was off her rocker and I think I am the only crazy one left in the family. But to be sure you better get some insurance! A dollar’s worth anyway………
Ben R. Bauer
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