I lied, yes, I told one too many and I was nailed to the cross for it. What I said about my sister not answering her phone, wasn’t true. I have apologized but don’t know if she accepted it or not. I thought she knew that I do not talk to machienes, I just hang up, I tossed and turned all night long because I was so ashamed of myself, and when I awoke, I had a wart on the end of my nose and my tongue was split like a serpent’s. So, It is a Bad day at 1124 North Seventh Street, Such power was not meant for man!
Eight out of ten family members are angry with me. It seems that I am living on the outside of everything. One more little misstep and I’ll fall off the edge. So !You don’t have to tell anyone that we are related and I won’t say anything to anyone!
It appears that mother gave birth to three Idiots and I was the first. The other two disappeared a long time ago and no one knows who they were or where they went. I had always wondered why the birds always shit on me and why dogs always wanted to bite me and why I was always standing alone, when in a crowd. Some people would even say; what is that terrible smell and where is it coming from?
I know, why people kept driving me way out of town and leaving me there in the wild. Not all Mother’s love their young! If you were to search the bottom of the pond, you will find more than a couple of gunny sacks with rocks and bones in them.
Now you know why, I am said to be so Negative, and people are right, when they say that. I always think and appear on the down side, and my stories show it. You have to be for something or against it. There is little that pleases a person so, I always go to the negative side. There is nothing so good, that it can’t be improved up on! There is no set number that says you are going too fast or too slow, it’s always a personal judgment, each person needs to make for them selves.
The dark side is always dark and this is where you will find the bad, the ugly, the scary and smelly, along with half dead things. I never go there as they are found on this side also and they all thrive on the good. Being rich is bad, being poor is even worse! Remember, the Devil is watching you! And my wife has his long handled jabbing fork. He has been so busy, down in the furnace room, he hasn’t missed it yet. ( I have been told to stop poking fun at, and running the old girl down,) so forget that last part .that I wrote! “Actually”, she is a charter member of the Angels Union !
One that has been used up, or worn down, is all the same, where ever you stand! If you can’t tell the story in your own words, then why tell it?
Remember those Green ( S & H ) Stamps, you always got for the things you bought? What am I going to do with all them? I have full books of stamps that I have saved, The shelves in the garage are full of boxes. of them stamp books!
There was also a box full of dishes that I got from the Mobil Station. Remember when you got one with each purchase of gas? But it fell to the floor and now there is nothing but broken pieces.
The dishes you got in a box of oatmeal, were better quality. Cracker jack was another item that had a prize in it. My old friend, Jack Arm Long had a prize in their boxes of wheaties as well! Now, you get nothing for free at triple the price!
Peg is cleaning out the kennel and put down a fresh bowl of water. The dog never uses that anymore, could it be for me? All good things come to an end, sooner or later. If we don’t get to say good-by, I’ll always remember you as a true friend!
Okay now, let’s all say this together,,, POOR MISTREATED BEN…………
By: Ben R.
May 5,2011
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