Once up-on a time, I think it was on a Thursday, a lawyer had gotten himself into some trouble, which made his wife, of some thirteen years, Angry and much in distress.
She had filed charges and was taking him to court to punish him. She would take away his fancy car, the house and all the money that was in the bank.
This lady had a brother, who was also a lawyer and he agreed to represent her at the trial. That evening, the night before the trial was to start, she was preparing their dinner and was thinking about putting some rat poison in his food. Searching for something under the sink, all she could find was a box with blue and white powder in it, and it said lye on the outside of the box. She decided to try that! The smell was so bad, she added some of her perfume to cover the odor and that worked.
The next day, when the ( husband ) lawyer took the stand and was asked a question, he would lie. ( as you know, Lye will make a person lie!) So when he was asked to give his name, he said he was someone else. When asked where he lived, he gave an address that was not his. The Judge finally adjourned the trial and was hoping for a better day tomorrow.
That evening, when preparing the evening meal, she added a toilet bowl cleaner to his food. It was called Sanity-flush. She was thinking, this will surly do the job. When it was added to water in the toilet bowl, it would bubble and boil and make the toilet clean. She was running a little behind with the food preparation for the meal, but he was late getting home that evening. He was having a long talk with his lawyer and the lawyer came home to have dinner with him. This really made her angry, so she would let them serve themselves, the dinner.
The next day in the court room, it was a disaster. Never before had a court room been filled so full of B. M. and the smell that almost killed all the people in the room. Court was again adjourned, this time for three days. It took three cleaning crews to clean and get rid of the deadening smell.
The husband’s lawyer never recovered, he died and the husband was hospitalized. That was when the lady remembered the gun in the bedside table.
When the husband was ready to be discharged, she drove to the hospital to pick him up, Her husband had a bandage covering his eyes, so he could not see anything. Then she drove her car to the top of a near by volcano, where there was a viewing platform, and while pointing the gun at the husband, she ordered him to get out of the car! She said Jump, or I will shoot you where you stand!
The Volcano rumbled and the earth shock and she lost her balance and she tumbled down into the motion lava, in the volcano, and the husband went rolling down the outside of the volcano.
After rolling several thousand yards, he crashed through an old outhouse and hit a huge rock. He had broken his neck’ and somehow he managed to get a board down his back and tucked under his belt. He than tied his head to the board with his neck-tie, to stabilize his head from moving.
As he turned to look back up the volcano, there on the rim, stood some thing, all dressed in red, with horns, a tail and holding a pitch fork in hand. Could it have been the Devils mate?
Once again this Lawyer was placed in the hospital and a week later, the Devils’ mate came to get him.
As we all know, not all Lawyers are honest, At least I have never had one that was. Most are legalized crooks, They are so dishonest they won’t give you the right time of the day. And not only that, but the judge doesn’t want you to defend yourself at any trial
You can rest assured, that down under, there is a special place for Lawyers and all of them will be there sooner or later. Heaven help the innocent!
By: Ben R. ☺
Jan. 10, 2013
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